Feel Better

You Are Not The Feeling (from Mae Martin’s SAP)

I like this bit from Mae Martin’s recent Netflix Special SAP:

I have a lot of feelings. I’m full to the absolute brim with feelings. I always visualize them like a Campbell’s cream of tomato soup can. And then I’m full to the brim. Right to the top of my skull, just trying to keep it contained. Just trying to keep it from sloshing out of my orifices as I make my way through life. That’s how I feel about my feelings.

I got a therapist recently. He’s really smart and we Zoom, and he said something interesting in a recent session: “Remember, you are not the feeling.” “Sure you feel consumed by the feeling, but you are not the feeling.”

He said, “Within you, and within everyone, there’s a very still, neutral, eternal self.” “And you experience the feelings, but you’re not consumed by them.” He said, “Rather than identifying so much with the feeling, like, ‘I’m anxious. I’m sad. I miss you.’” He said, “Don’t be consumed by the feeling.” “Just observe the feelings as they come, with curiosity.”

Have you heard that before? So I think you’re just supposed to be like, “Huh! I’m experiencing rage. I’m experiencing despair. I’m experiencing resentment.”

“How curious.”

“How curious.”